Top 5 Blog Posts of 2012 - #4

This article seems to have some staying power. It was actually a reprint on one first published in August of 2011. What that tells me is that all of us have baggage that needs to be dealt with properly - sounds like a good New Years resolution.

"Take Out The Trash" - The Principle of Transformation

Part 2 of 6
This series is based on the last chapter of the book “Good to Great in God’s Eyes” by Chip Ingram. The first subject dealt with the principle of priority – “Put God First.” We looked at the reasons why God has to be at the center of any meaningful change in our lives.

Today I'm writing about taking out the trash, or the principle of transformation. How is it that we can be changed from the person that we’ve been into the person we want to be? Is change even possible? Many people would say that it’s not. You are who you are and you’re stuck with it.

What is it that makes us what we are, anyway? Is it genes? Is it our upbringing? Is it the experiences we’ve had; the trauma we’ve endured or the examples we’ve seen? The truth is that it’s all of these things and none of these things. All of these have a bearing on the kind of people we’ve become. But I can show you people who’ve been raised in the same home, been through the same things, had the same type of upbringing and yet are radically different. So, what is it?

I believe that much of who we are is based upon what we do with what we’ve experienced, and that is dictated by the way that we think. The principle of transformation comes straight out of Romans 12:2: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” There's a negative command in that verse that literally says to stop being conformed, or molded, to this world. Quit allowing the world system — its ideas, images, and values — to shape who you are. Get the trash out of your life.

This world and its systems have a powerful affect on the way that we think. If we’re not careful, we just gradually absorb messages over time and begin to accept them without thinking about whether or not they’re true. What are the lies that we believe? Many women believe that they have to look like Barbie; that they will never be good enough for someone to love them; or that they’re stupid, or fat and ugly; or that they are worthless or a lousy mother or wife. Many men believe that they will never amount to anything; that they’re a failure; that money or work equal love; that no matter what they do they’re not good enough.

That message might have come from the media or from a family member, from our friends or from a misguided teacher. It probably came from someone who didn’t intend to give you that message, but it’s there just the same. No matter what you do, that message that is recorded in your mind just keeps cropping up, keeping you from moving forward.

It’s not just those personal messages either, there are also truth claims that people accept, without thinking, that have a way of cluttering up our minds and confusing us. These are cultural assumptions that go unchallenged, and often leave us believing a lie. A famous Canadian example is the unimpeachable value of tolerance. Now I’m all for tolerance, by the original definition. What it used to mean was that you tolerated people who were different from you and allowed them to practice their beliefs in freedom. But what it’s grown to mean in today’s culture is quite different. Today any questioning of the truth claims of another person or religion makes you intolerant. A fall-out from that is that a great many people have lost the ability to think critically; to use reason. One of the lies I hear repeated often is that all religions are basically the same. That is not even close to being a true statement, but many accept it as fact.

So what are we to do with the messages in our minds that don’t belong; that are actually harmful? How do we change this? The first thing we need to do is to stop allowing the wrong sources to program our thinking. It’s the first rule of holes: when you’re in one – stop digging.

The second thing we need to do is to replace the lies with the truth. In 1 Corinthians 13:11 Paul says, “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” In the Greek, it’s far more expressive. It basically says that he abolished and did away with the childish thinking.


In a modern analogy, it’s like going through all of the old files on your computer and getting rid of the unnecessary ones that you never use anymore. There are some files that just take up space and slow the system down. There are others that can actually be harmful, like viruses, and the longer you allow them to hang around, the more damage they cause you. They can sometimes make the whole system crash. GIGO (Garbage In, Garbage Out).

A lot of people can identify the thinking that has gotten them messed up, but don’t know how to change it. In the second part of Romans 12:2 Paul tells us how. Remember, the first part is a negative command, basically to stop allowing the world to force you into its mold.

That's followed by a positive command to allow God's Word to renew and transform you — to cause a metamorphosis, the same word used for the transfiguration of Jesus. Grammatically, this command is in the passive voice; God does it, but we allow it. We let our minds be transformed from the inside out so we can be people who prove and experience the will of God. Our lifestyle begins to demonstrate God's will — that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

Chip Ingram shares a story that illustrates the reality in far too many lives: "In my first pastorate in Kaufman, Texas, an older man who looked like he'd been through a lot came to church. His shirt was dirty, he looked and smelled like he hadn't taken a bath in six months, and he was hungry. We gave him some food, and the next week he brought his wife, who was in just as bad a condition as he was. After the service, they said they needed some money for electricity and other necessities."

"The church had a fund to help people, so I offered to go out to their house and visit. Theresa and I drove out in the country and found a house that didn't look very bad at all. A couple of horses and about five or six dogs in the yard all looked pretty healthy. But when we entered the house, I almost threw up from the stench. Garbage was on the floor, a container of something that had spoiled was left open, and cans of cat food for the nineteen cats running around the kitchen were spread out everywhere. The shades were pulled down, and he, his wife, and a very elderly woman sat in near darkness. I wondered how they could tolerate such nasty conditions, but when people live around trash long enough, they get accustomed to it. It starts to seem normal. We get used to a nauseating stench if we breathe it long enough."

I find that there are a lot of people like this. The mess that they're in has become "home." They know, at least on some level, that it's not good, but they have been there for so long that the possibility of change is foreign to them. God specializes in changing lives and giving fresh starts. He's prescribed clear directions for us - "be transformed by the renewing of (our) minds."

The first step on almost anyone's list is to admit that we have a problem. Once we understand that and identify the lie that we've been believing, we need to counteract it with the truth. It was Jesus, who said in John 8:32, "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Here's a sensitive question - what is it in your life that needs to change? What are the habits, lies, and attitudes that you need to take to the curb? There may be more at stake than you realize. For some, the decisions you make can not only improve your life, but the lives of those around you. Some lies (and some sins) are generational. Someone started it, and someone needs to end it. Let that someone be you.

As J. Michael Straczynski said, “People spend too much time finding other people to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not being what they are capable of being, and not enough energy putting themselves on the line, growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives.”

Related Posts:
“Put God First” - The Principle of Priority
Developing Great Habits
Who I Am Makes A Difference
Are You Listening?
Transformation 

"Do It Now" - The Principle of Inertia

This is a reprint of an article that appeared first in August of 2011. I hope you find it helpful.

Part 5 of 6
This is the continuation of a series based on the book "Good to Great in God's Eyes" by Chip Ingram. Here's a review of the first four: 
Part 1: Put God First – The Principle of Priority
Part 2: Take Out the Trash – The Principle of Transformation
Part 3: Do Your Own Dishes – The Principle of Responsibility
Part 4: Write it Down - The Principle of Clarity 

Inertia has been defined as "the tendency of a body at rest to remain at rest or of a body in straight line motion to stay in motion in a straight line unless acted on by an outside force." There is a propensity with most of us to stay where we are and to continue doing what we have been doing. Yet it also is true that "if we always do what we've always done, we'll always get what we've always gotten."

If you've read this far in the series it's quite likely that you really are wanting to make positive change in your life. If so, this key is vital for you: start now. The world is full of people who have every intention of doing the right thing. They're planning on saving, losing weight, getting in shape, charting a growth plan for their life or any number of worthwhile goals. Yet it never seems to happen.

For some it's because they suffer from "the paralysis of analysis" - the need to look at every aspect of the decision in minute detail. They fear making a mistake; so they wait for the "perfect" opportunity, but such do not exist. It's like they're stuck: ready, aim, aim, aim, aim... At some point, if we're going to get something done, we have to begin. "Fire" already!

Some wise person said "if you have to eat a frog, eat it first thing in the morning." While I have no desire to eat a frog, the point is valid. Get the project you dread out of the way as quickly as possible. The reason for this is obvious: the longer we wait, the larger the problem becomes in our minds. It grows fangs and claws and hair and learns how to hit us where it hurts!!! As William James said, "Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task." Conversely, dealing with issues or challenges early gives us a sense of accomplishment that helps with whatever else we might face.

One thing that I've found helpful is developing the habit of prioritizing. Once I list my tasks for the day I place them in order of priority. I try to tackle the most important things first. The challenge, however, is to not wait for something to become a crisis before it makes it to our priority list. Developing the habit of doing the small things in a timely matter can prevent them from becoming larger and more urgent down the road. As Chip Ingram writes: "When you've procrastinated and have a week's worth of papers to file, twelve calls to return, several days' worth of homework or office projects to complete, and five loads of laundry to do, it's a little demotivating, isn't it?"

Once we push ourselves into that kind of a corner, it can be overwhelming to get out. What I've learned over the years, as I've found myself in those situations, is to "lean into it." A leadership principle that applies here is to "accept the pressure of the moment." Resist the urge to throw your hands up in the air and run in the other direction, or to simply curl up on the couch. Simply begin by starting with that which is in front of you. In establishing the discipline of doing it now you can save yourself from a world of problems later. As my mother always told me, "never put off until tomorrow what you could do today."

Related Articles:
"Do Your Own Dishes" - The Principle of Responsibility
"Write It Down" - The Principle of Clarity
"Take Out the Trash" - The Principle of Transformation
“Put God First” - The Principle of Priority
Developing Great Habits

"Write it Down" - The Principle of Clarity

This is a reprint of an article that appeared first in August of 2011. I hope it's helpful.

We’re already at part four of a six part series about making positive change in our lives. Let me do a quick review:

Part 1: Put God First – The Principle of Priority
Part 2: Take Out the Trash – The Principle of Transformation
Part 3: Do Your Own Dishes – The Principle of Responsibility

You’ll notice, as we’ve progressed through this series that these principles we have laid down are building on each other. As we learn to really place God in that position of priority in our lives, our perspective begins to change; we start to see things differently. We also begin to see ourselves differently. We start to become aware of those things in our lives that actually get in the way of our accomplishing God’s will. We then can bring the junk in our lives to God, so that He can transform it into good stuff.

As we grow and change we’re able to take our place and assume our share of the responsibility in God’s Kingdom. We understand that each and every one of us is important in God’s plan and that, for everything to work properly, we all play a part. So now what? Where do we go from there? Proverbs 20:5 says “The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.”

In this essay we’re exploring how it is that we discern God’s will for our lives. In Habakkuk 2 we find a place where God has been revealing to His prophet things that are to come. Read what it says in verse 2: "Then the LORD replied: 'Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald may run with it.'"

I believe that this provides us with a clue. There is a power in writing things down. It helps us to clarify what we truly believe. It gives focus to our intentions and even helps us to see where we’re wrong. It also helps us to remember in the dark times what God has showed us in the good times.

A few years ago I sat down and started looking at my values. I asked myself the question, what is it that I truly think is important? As I was preparing this series I went back and reviewed the list that I came up with. Here are some examples:
• I will place God first in my life.
• I will be a man of integrity.
• I will maintain a positive attitude.
• I will be committed to my family.
• I will be innovative in leading the church.
• I will be committed to personal growth.
• I will be committed to excellence.
• I will remember that everyone is someone for whom Christ died.

There are a few others, but you get the idea. I felt that writing them down helped me to clarify those things to which I was really committed. There were some things I thought were important, but when I began to try to put pen to paper I reconsidered. Seeing them in black and white made me realize they didn’t belong on that list. Some people have found it helpful to put each of these values on a 3” x 5” card that they carried in their car or kept in a place where they could refer to them often. It helped them to keep focus. Others have done this same exercise as a family, they’ve actually sat down as a family and written down agreed upon values. It reminds me of Joshua, who declared in Joshua 24:15, “But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.” This list gave me a beginning point in developing a growth plan for my life. For each of those I then began to make a to-do list of things that could help me in those areas.

For example, under “I will place God first” I wrote these points:
• My definition of success is to find what God would have me do and do it.
• I will make it a priority to spend time alone with God daily for prayer and devotion.
• I will not neglect the reading of God’s Word.

These statements help me to refocus when life gets going too crazy. I revisit this and remind myself of what should come first and foremost.

I also use a personal planner. Part of that is because of my personality. I know that if I don’t write it down I will tend to forget it. I also know that writing it down and prioritizing it helps me to be more efficient. So, if you look at my planner, you’ll find that right near the top of the list each day is Prayer and Bible reading. Every day I will either be able to check those items off the list or be reminded that I need to pay more attention. This habit has helped me to develop other positive habits in my life.

Another thing that I have learned to use more effectively is a calendar. As soon as I make a commitment I put that on a calendar. Then I regularly review the calendar to see which of those items are going to require some advance work. I can then break those tasks down into steps and actually put them in my to-do list in the order they need to be done. One of the lessons I’ve learned over the years is that you have to eat an elephant one bite at a time. Break a large job down into many steps and any task becomes doable.

We look at the Biblical example of Nehemiah in the Old Testament. Nehemiah was a Jew living in captivity in Persia, now known as Iran. He had never been to Jerusalem because he was born a captive. Many years before, his ancestors had been carried away by the Babylonians when Jerusalem fell. The city walls and temple were destroyed.

Now generations later, some of the Jews had returned to Jerusalem and had begun to worship God again in the nation of Israel. But they were leaderless and confused. They didn’t know God’s expectations of them and were living far beneath God’s plan for them. But, remember, God always has a plan. He had prepared this man by the name of Nehemiah – he had been placed in the position of cupbearer to the king.

He heard about the situation in Jerusalem; that the walls were broken down; that the people were confused; that there were enemies all around them. And a very strange thing happened – Nehemiah’s heart began to break. Something took place inside the heart of a servant in Persia that would affect the nation of Israel hundreds of miles away. A lot of times in church we call this a burden or a calling.

God places a burden, a weight, on an individual and they know that they must do something. They may be sitting in a service, hearing someone talk or simply reading a magazine article about a place, a people or a need and they just begin to feel this overwhelming sense of responsibility. Anyone who’s done anything of eternal significance has felt this weight, this burden, this call.

You hear it represented in John Knox as he declared “Give me Scotland, else I die.” You hear it in William Booth as he said “While women weep, as they do now, I'll fight; while little children go hungry, as they do now, I'll fight; while men go to prison, in and out, in and out, as they do now, I'll fight; while there is a drunkard left, while there is a poor lost girl upon the streets, while there remains one dark soul without the light of God, I'll fight-I'll fight to the very end!” And here we see it in Nehemiah. It says in Nehemiah 1:4, “When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven.”

So here’s the question. How does a servant cupbearer in Persia, who has never been to Jerusalem, rebuild the walls of that city hundreds of miles away?

How does a simple preacher in Scotland change the spiritual climate of a nation? How does an evangelist in England build a worldwide organization, the Salvation Army, which is synonymous with compassionate ministry? He does it one bite, one step, at a time.

Nehemiah started with an audience with the king – he took advantage of what he had at his disposal, his relationship with the king. He asked for letters of safe passage (in other words, the king’s protection). Then he asked for enough materials to do the job. Once there he assessed the situation. Then he recruited his volunteers and set to work. He broke it down into steps, and for our sake, he wrote it down. In spite of opposition and challenges, the wall was built.

Do you want to know God’s will for your life? Here are some keys:
• Immerse yourself in the Word of God – this is primarily how God speaks to us.
• Spend time in prayer – this is how God molds our hearts.
• Learn your spiritual gifts. The Bible tells us that all Christians have some.
• Do what you can, where you are, with what you have. Be faithful.

Once those habits are established in your life, answer these questions:
• What do you cry about?
• What do you laugh about?
• What do you dream about?

The answers to those questions will go a long way in helping to reveal your passions and discerning God’s will for your life. Writing down what you receive will help to bring clarity of purpose and enable you to focus on that which is most important. As someone said, "It's only a dream until you write it down, and then it becomes a goal."

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all our ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5-6

Related Articles:
Developing Great Habits
Seven Keys For A Better Life
Think For Yourself! Don't Get Stuck in a "Filter Bubble"
Assumptions

"Do Your Own Dishes" - The Principle of Responsibility

This is a reprint of an article that appeared first in August of 2011. It's been one of my most popular posts ever since. I hope it strikes a chord with you.

This lesson is Part 3 of a 6 part series on making positive change in our lives. It's based, in part, on the book Good to Great in God's Eyes by Chip Ingram. I ran across a poem by Edna Wheeler Wilcox in one of John Maxwell's books. I liked it so much I still remember the gist of it years later. Here is part of it:

Two Kinds of People

There are two kinds of people on earth today,
Two kinds of people no more I say.
Not the good or the bad, for it's well understood,
The good are half bad, the bad are half good.
No! the two kinds of people on earth I mean,
Are the people who lift, (and)the people who lean.

This writing is about responsibility, specifically, taking responsibility for our own lives. Many of us grew up with mothers who, regardless of the busyness of their own schedules, would be sure that all of the dishes in the house were washed and dried. A wise mother eventually teaches her children how to take responsibility and do their own dishes. Unfortunately, there are a great many people who, though well into adulthood, are still refusing to take responsibility for their own lives.

Some have grown quite proficient at the "blame game." It's not their fault that they forgot to pay the utilities bill; didn't see the stop sign; had teachers that didn't understand them, etc... ad nauseum. There are some who have accepted the role of victim, constantly bemoaning the fact that "life isn't fair" and that they never get a break. To be honest, I have played that card a few times in my life and understand the sentiment. But what I've learned is that it's simply not helpful.

There are a few things that we need to understand about life. First of all, as I said in the first part of this series: life isn't fair. Some people do seem to have more breaks than others. Some are born with wealthy parents who love them; others are born into poverty and abusive environments. Some breeze through school with healthy self-esteem; some struggle painfully at every level. Regardless of our lot in life, the principle of responsibility teaches that we must own up to whatever reality we face.

It is quite remarkable looking at a list of all of the great men and women of history who overcame great odds to make a difference. Sir Isaac Newton's father died before Isaac was born; his mother raised him in poverty. He went on to become one of the fathers of modern science and discovered the law of gravity. Benjamin Franklin was the 15th of 17th children and only had one year's formal education. Yet he taught himself 4 languages, science, finance, politics and much more and became a great statesman and author. There are legions of others. Conversely, the tabloids are full of failures who came from a life of privilege. I believe one of the key differences is the principle we're speaking of today.

If you want to make a difference in this world you have to be honest with yourself. As John Maxwell states, "no matter where you are, there you are." You might wish to start elsewhere, but that is not up to you. The truth is, it doesn't matter whose fault it is, if it's about you, it's your responsibility. What does this look like in real life?

You may have had a troubled childhood, with painful memories that have scarred and affected you deeply. I'm not minimizing anyone's pain, but there are two clear choices I see. You can wallow in that pain, allowing it to limit your progress and define your future, or you can choose to move through it, allowing it to make you stronger. Though it may not be your fault, it is still your responsibility. The effect of ignoring the problem may mean that your children, or others you love, pay the price, and an ugly cycle is repeated. Do your own dishes.

There are some incredible examples in the Bible of people who overcame horrible obstacles to make their mark on history, partly because they chose to view the events of their past through the lens of God's sovereignty. These examples include Joseph, sold into slavery by his own brothers, wrongfully accused, convicted and imprisoned, only to be eventually raised to the right hand of the Pharaoh of Egypt. You can see his positive perspective in his statement to his brothers once he reached the throne: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." (Genesis 50:20)

Believing that God loves you is one of the keys to being able to face up to our responsibilities. The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." When you think you're facing more than you can handle, hear the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

The good news is that God hasn't left us alone. He will walk with us through whatever storms that life may throw at us. He will help us to redeem and even redefine our past. As Peter said, in 2 Peter 1:3 says, "His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness." You can choose to make the world a better place by what you do with what you have. Are you part of the problem, or part of the solution? Don't lean - lift!

Related Articles:
"Take Out the Trash" - The Principle of Transformation
“Put God First” - The Principle of Priority
Developing Great Habits
Book Review: "It Came From Within!"
The Great Paradox

More Life Lessons From A Fellow Traveler

A couple of days ago I posted a blog on some of the life lessons that I've learned along the way. Here are some more that I hope you'll find helpful. Feel free to share some of yours in the comments section.

Fail Forward
Everyone blows it, some of us more regularly than others. The difference is that some learn from their mistakes while others don't. Failing forward means growing through our failures; pulling something good, some lesson learned, from each setback we encounter. Someone said that when you fall you may as well pick something up while you're down there.

Thomas Edison came up with the incandescent light after a thousand failures. Some of my greatest lessons in life have been learned from failure. What we need to remember is that to fail doesn't mean we are a failure, it simply means that we've identified something else that doesn't work, and we have the opportunity to try again more intelligently. The question is not whether or not we'll fall, it's which direction we are facing when we get back up - keep moving forward.

Pursue Excellence
One of my pet peeves is to hear people say "that's good enough." As a Christian, part of my worldview is that God is not just God in Church; He's God of all of my life. For that reason, all that we do should be done with excellence. We see the results of this kind of thinking in incredible masterpieces like the Sistine Chapel.

The artists, including Michelangelo, went to painstaking detail on each fresco, whether a centerpiece, or one that was hidden in a dimly lit corner. When asked why they would take such great effort to paint something that no-one would see, one of them said "because God will see it."  The quality of their work has stood the test of time.

We are losing this value in our culture, whether it's in furniture making or in music. We tend to look for the easy way, rather than the right way. Yet, when we are looking to purchase something, whether a car or a table, we expect quality. I'm not an artisan, I'm more of a wordsmith, and I'm certainly not saying that I'm anything special. But whatever I do create, I'd like it to be of good quality and I want to give it my best effort. As my mother used to say, "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing well."

Your Attitude Will Make You Or Break You

This, obviously, is one of the most important life lessons to be learned. Each of us will face problems in our lives. Each of us will encounter hardships, be treated unfairly and have our share of bad breaks. I like the words of Viktor Frankl, who survived one of the Nazi concentration camps. He said: "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's way."

William James writes that "The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind." I have found this to be very true. So here's a question, what are you feeding your mind? The computer term GIGO (Garbage in: garbage out) applies to people as well. I learned a long time ago that reading the right books, listening to the right people; attending the right events can actually make a positive difference in my life. I try to monitor my attitude and keep myself exposed to positive influences and correct my thinking when it gets off track. "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." (Romans 12:2)

Let me conclude by sharing a quote from Charles Swindoll which I've kept for many years: "The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude... I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it."

So, what are the life lessons that have made a difference to you?

Related Articles:

Life Lessons From A Fellow Traveler

Which Me Will You Be?

Made For Relationship

Seven Keys For A Better Life

Deliver Us From Mediocrity